The past few months…

So a lot of medical stuff has been going on the past few months. In the beg of august I took you to see an allergist. You have always had a little bit of a tummy issue. You never really went poop a lot like a regular person. I don't ever remember you being a regular pooper…ever! So since I always hear that autistic kids have a lot of allergy problems I thought that I would see if you were allergic to anything. When we got there they told me that they couldn't really do much until I took you to a GI doc to rule out more tummy issues. When we went to the GI doc he told me it was just a classic case of constipation and that we needed to increase your fiber and you should start going again. So back to the allergist we went. He did the tests and it all came back fine! You were not allergic to anything food related. We were so happy!

So we go back to GI for our follow up. I tell the doc that increasing your fiber did not really do anything at all. So he said…let's do a few tests and see if that shows anything. So we did an x-ray and blood work for celiac disease, testing your thyroid, and then just a normal blood count. I didn't hear back from the doc for a few weeks so I figured everything came back fine. One day daddy called me and said…um Jacob's doc office has been trying to get a hold of you. You never gave them your new phone number. I had forgotten that they had the cell phone number and I no longer had that phone anymore. So I get a hold of the doc and they tell me that your x-ray showed that your colon was full of poop. And that we needed to put you on a clean out. We needed to give you miralax and xlax 6 times a day for 4 days. So we did that….and nothing happened. I called the doc the next day after the clean out ended and she said…well do it again. Sometimes if it's been sitting there for a while it takes a little bit of time to break up. Try it again and it should work. So that next weekend we tried it again. I had an appt with the GI on Monday so I went back to him and told him…nothing worked. He wanted us to get another x-ray done ASAP. And if it showed that he still had poop in his colon, Jacob would have to be admitted for a clean out that they do in the hospital. So we took you right away and went to the x-ray. They called me the next day and said that sure enough, it showed MORE in your colon. So a few days later they called me and said they were ready for you to come.

This was our first hospital stay for anyone in our family. I was not sure what to expect and I know you didn't know what to do either. They called us at 5pm and by the time we got there and up to our room it was around 7pm. That's also when the nurses change shifts. So it took a while for us to get things started. I was just anxious for things to get started and to get out of the hospital. Around 9pm they told me that they were going to take you and put a NG tube in. They took a small little tube and put it down your nose and down your throat and into your stomach. They sedated you so you were a little sleepy but you definitely felt what was going on. I could hear you screaming from the other room and it just broke my heart. As your mom, I really hated seeing you in so much pain. I just cried because I wanted all that pain to go away. I didn't want you to feel like that anymore. When you came back you looked so sad. I could tell that you were crying and it broke my heart even more. Well you started crying again because you couldn't swallow or close your mouth with that tube in. And you cried and cried until around 11pm. Finally we got you to calm down because you wanted to go on a little walk. So I told you that you had to stop crying if you wanted to go on a walk because we didn't want to wake up the other kids that were on the floor. We also had a roommate and we didn't want you to wake him up either. 48 hours later you were released because you were cleaned out!! Yipee!! I was so excited to be out of that place and not have to deal with the yucky clean out process again.

That night you told me your head hurt. I just told you to go lay down and you kinda shrugged it off so I did the same. A few days went by and you complained again of another headache…and same thing happened again. You just shrugged it off so I did the same. Tuesday night you started just screaming! Daddy and I were so scared we had no idea what was going on. When you scream in pain like that we know something is seriously wrong because you have such a high pain tolerance that nothing hurts you. You said that your head hurt so very bad. So we told you to go to bed and you did. About an hour later you came back out seeming fine and sat on the couch and watched tv. I looked over and you were lying on the chair with a blanket and a pillow over your head. I am pretty sure you either had another migraine or that it never went away. The morning came and I asked if your head still hurt. You told me it did so I said well you will have to stay home from school and you can't go to scouts tonight. He told me…I think I need to stay home but I still can go to scouts. So I figured you were faking and sent you on your way to school. Just in case you were not faking I wrote a little note to your teacher just saying that if you got a headache to call me ASAP and I would come get you. About 9am I get a phone call from the front desk lady at your school and she said that you were in class and complained that you had a headache. Your teacher asked if you wanted to go lay down and you said yes. So she got you up and started to walk across the hall and you then passed out. So I ran out of the house and ran to the school. When I got there I got another phone call that said to not freak out but they had to call the fire dept to come and check you out. When I got there you were on the couch and you just looked so sick. Your teacher said that when she saw you, you were so pale. You looked almost grey! So they were taking your blood pressure and you had to stand up for it. When you stood up you passed out again! So they decided that you needed to be taken to the hospital. They called an ambulance and they took you to PCH (Phoenix Children's Hospital) When we got there they told me that while you were in the ambulance they pressed on your tummy and you said that it hurt. So they wanted to do more x-rays and see where you stood from there. So once the x-rays came back they told me that there was MORE poop in there than there was when you went in the first time that last week. The doctors were all confused on why it was coming back so fast. So once again, they wanted to admit us to the hospital to take care of it. So we went home with them saying that we needed to wait for a call. Wednesday went and came…so did Thursday, and Friday…and most of Saturday. You were still having headaches and your stomach hurt and we knew that we had to get you into the hospital. Grandma and Grandad were really worried and so they called the doc themselves and told him that you really needed to be admitted and fast! So our doc told us to take you back to the ER. That way you would be there and they would have to admit us. So we did. They did more x-rays and again showed that there was a lot of poop in there. So we were in the ER for 4 hours before they FINALLY took us up to a room.

This time around we knew what to expect. It was so much easier on us all. You knew what was going on and we also knew what to do. We were prepared for the long nights and for the bed and diaper changing every 20 min or so. Well when we got up to your room we found out we had a roommate. It made it hard because your roommate needed a lot of attention also. So it kept us up most of the time. We didn't get much sleep. You got admitted on Saturday night and we were told that nothing was going to happen until Monday morning. So we were just hanging out in the hospital until Monday when the procedures would happen. You had to get an MRI and also a barium enema. Those are not fun tests for you. The MRI you had to be put out. So while they put you out we requested that they put the NG tube in while you were sleeping. It was so much easier being able to get it done that way because you woke up and it was already in! All the tests they did on you came back fine. They said that you did not have any of the diseases that they had thought you had. So that was very good to hear!

Right now you still are not going poop like we want but you are definitely going more than you were before. We go see the doc on Nov 1^st so hopefully they will get us on something that will help you. I hope all of this madness is over with but your doc told me that this is probably going to be a way of life for us. And that you will need many clean outs. Let's just hope it's not every week!!

Love ya buddy

Mommy

Happy 8th Birthday Jacob!!!

Hey buddy-

So you are the big 8 years old! What a birthday this was for you. You had so much fun on this day. You were special enough to be able to get baptized on your birthday. So after your baptism we went back to our house and had a birthday party for you. All of your cousins came to support you. It was such a nice day.

You have grown up so much in these past 8 years. I still cant believe that I have an 8 year old son!! Jacob, you are so special to us. I am so glad that you are my son.

This past month has been a trying one on you. You sure are trying hard at school, and I can tell. However, I think that you need more help than you are getting at school. You are having so much fun making new friends and it makes me so happy. I got a happy tear in my eye the other day because when I dropped you off at school I actually saw a boy calling your name and wanted you to come to him. And that makes me so happy. At school you are doing wonderful, socially. You are making friends and you are being so good to them and they are being so good to you. But adjusting to class is not easy for you. You are having a hard time listening and following directions. I get to meet with your teacher and the special ed department and we are going to figure out what to do to be able to help you.

I love you buddy and im so glad that you are my big 8 year old now.

Love,

Mommy

First day of school

Jacob-

Yesterday was your first day of school at Eagle! You and your brother looked so handsome in your uniforms. You were so nervous about starting. You did not want to go to school because it was not at LIFE and you did not have Ms Lori, Ms Erika, and Ms Dar! I am sorry that you were so upset about it all. But I promise this school will be just as good.

Yesterday when we got there you were a little upset that there was a girl sitting next to you. But I promise it won't be that bad. You will come to not be so scared of the girls. When you got home you told me that you had such a good day. And that it wasn't so scary at all.

I got an email from your teacher and here is what it says…

Hi Britney,

I just wanted to let you know how today went for Jacob.  Overall, I was very pleased.  The morning was a little difficult.  Jacob was very eager to answer questions, and quite often, forgot to raise his hand or wait his turn.  However, after a quick reminder, he self-corrected his behavior.  The afternoon was great!  Jacob was very attentive and had very few interruptions; although he looked quite tired!  He also did great socializing with his peers.  During indoor recess, he played a matching game (that he loved!) with a few other boys.   As a whole, I felt Jacob had a good day!

Please let me know if you have any questions.

Thanks!
Rachael Bergman

 

I am so glad that you did well. It was expected that you had a rough morning because you were just getting used to the school. But so far so good! I really hope that today is a better day for you. You really wanted to go back to school today so I know that you had a good time. You had PE yesterday and loved it!! The PE teacher even knows who you are! So he must really like you. You are special you get to have 2 teachers. Ms Hansen is your special ed teacher. She gets to help you when you start to feel nervous or when you get upset or feel that you can't do your work. She is right across the hall so it's easy for you to get to her class. She also is going to help you make some new friends. I know you want to have friends so bad so I am excited for you to start making friends and to start loving school. I love you buddy and I hope this year is great for you!

Love, Mommy

Summer!

Hey buddy. Sorry I didn't write how the summer went. Summer is now over but I will still write how the summer went.

You had a very good summer!! It was full of fun and playing and lots of swimming. When we moved you had to leave LIFE and not have therapy. But after a month I realized that you still needed therapy. So we worked something out with LIFE that we would go on one day and you would have a few therapies on that day. So Monday was your therapy day. We also took advantage of the summer movie program at Harkins Theaters. And Wednesday was our movie day. It was a lot of fun. We saw some good movies that you loved. We also went and saw toy story 3. You really liked that movie too. So did your brother. We went swimming lots here in the pool by us. We also went swimming with your lomu cousins a few times at the pool in Mesa.

I hope you had fun this summer. I know that I sure did, even though I was sun burnt a lot of it!!

 

Love ya buddy!

Mommy

A week in the house

Well we have been in the new house for a week and a half now. I wish I could say that its been a great move. I wish I could say that its been easy on you. But it has not been. You are not liking the change. You are angry all the time. You seem sad all the time. You are not the same Jacob that you were before.

You are having a hard time with the neighbor kids already. They were laughing at you and you did not like that. I am not sure why they were laughing at you but this is just what you told me. You asked them to stop and they would not stop so you got your new bat and you hit 2 boys on their head and back with the bat. Those kids came over and told us that you had hit them with the bat but we didnt know why. So when we asked you later that night that is what you told us.

You are also being so mean to Tyler. Just a few min ago you gave him a black eye. You hit him in his eye and hurt him. Its almost an hourly thing right now. He cant talk or change the channel when you are watching tv without you getting very angry with him. Hopefully you will cheer up soon!!

*If any therapists are reading this...is there anything I can do to help him not be so angry? Is this just all part of the move?

Move is over

Well we are in our new house. Things are going pretty good. You are adapting well to the new house and the new rules we now have set.

Today was your last day at your school/therapy center. I just wanted to write down a few emotions so that we never forget.

I was not there to pick you up from school. Tyler had a meeting at his school that I had to be at. So grandma came instead to pick you up. I am glad I did not go. This has been very emotional for me. This is the first place you came when we first found out about your autism. This is where you were through everything you have been through. You have grown so much in the past 2 1/2 years. I think leaving your school was the hardest on you and me! Grandma told me that when you were saying goodbye you started to cry. I am sorry for doing this to you. I know you are going to miss your friends and your teachers but I promise you will see them again! You have been so sad at home. Every hour or so you just take a few min and sit and think. And I can tell you get a little sad. We were talking about good memories that you had in school earlier today and you started to cry again. But I know that you will do better tomorrow. We have a new journey ahead of us and I am excited and scared at the same time.

You got such great things on your last day of school. You got a new back pack and lunch box!! You were so happy about that. You will use it every day and think of your teachers when you use it. I know it will be very special to you. You also got a really cool bat and ball. There were some markers and crayons and some coloring books that will help get you through the long summer. Also there were some very sweet cards written by the boys in your class. Those are something that you will always keep im sure.

Love ya,

Mommy

On the move...again!

Well we have stayed in our house for 4 years now...and its time to move on. We are moving at the end of April. But we arent moving to somewhere strange. We are moving into your Uncle Trent and Aunt Jackies house. They moved into a much bigger house and said that we could move into their house if we wanted to. So we jumped on that opportunity to move to Phoenix.

This move is a good and bad thing. Good, because we will get to have a change of everything. New house, new city, new attractions, and new people to be around. But bad because you have to leave everything you know. You have to leave your school, you have to leave your therapy center, you have to leave your friends at school, and you have to leave being by your grandma all the time. But thats ok because we will all learn to adapt to new things.

You will have a new school! Its going to be so much fun for you. You get to make new friends and have new teachers. You will be going to a real school just like you always ask me to go to. But you will still get the help that you need and the help that you want. You have teachers that care for you and want the best for you so we will make sure you have everything that you need at this new school.

You will also go to a new therapy center. Thats going to be fun because you get to meet new therapists. You always love getting a new therapist so this should be fun for you. We will miss all of your therapists you have right now so much. I know its going to be hard for you to leave them. But just remember that they still care about you as much as you care about them.

Dont worry about this change buddy. I promise its going to be a good one.

Love ya,

Mommy

Your birthday!! Aug '09

Happy birthday buddy. Today you are 7 years old. I cant believe you are this big already! Time has really flown by. You are getting smarter and smarter every day. You are learning so much and I cant believe how much you have grown over the years. Both physically and mentally. You are such a tough little boy and we are so proud of you for it.

This year for your birthday was a fun one. And I hope its something you will always remember. We went to California and we took you and Tyler to Disney Land. It was you boys first time. It was also daddy's first time going there as well. So it was a fun experience for all 3 of you. And of course it was fun for me too!! I cant wait to go back again because you had so much fun. Because you have autism its hard for you to stand and wait in lines. So at Disney Land they have a pass where you don't have to wait behind a lot of people to get on the rides. It made things so much better. We didn't have to wait behind people and we didn't even have to wait long for many rides. That way we were able to do a lot more. Your favorite rides were the scary ones. We went on a little roller coaster and you loved that one. You also loved the haunted mansion. That one scared you quite a bit but you still loved it.

We love you so much and cant wait for your next birthday and whats to come in the next year!!

Love,

Mommy

You dont like needles! Nov '08

Today we had to get your blood drawn for some of the blood tests that we have to do. So we went in there and you were pretty nervous. You started crying when they put the needle in and then as soon as you saw the blood go in the vials you were fine. You thought it looked so cool that his "bleed" was going in the vials. So they had to take 3 tubes of blood from you. The first 2 were fine. Then she put the 3rd one in. And all of a sudden the blood stopped coming. So she jiggled the needle a little bit and put it in and out and still nothing. You started screaming because you were really scared. All of a sudden you just went limp in my arms!! You had passed out!! I wont lie...I was really scared when it hap pend. Then a few seconds later when you woke up I was laughing because it was kinda funny. And daddy HATES needles. And he will pass out just seeing them. So you passing out was just funny because your daddy does the same thing. Then when I tried to tell daddy the story he made me stop in the middle of it because just talking about needles was making him light headed haha.

Love ya

Mommy

School update Sept '08

I just thought I would put a little update on here about your school. Your doing AWESOME!! Since the scholarships came through, they are able to split the classes. So one class is for the advanced learners and one for the beginning learners. Which basically means they split the verbal and non verbal kids. Which is awesome for both groups!! That means that there is 10 kids in your class and 5 adults in the class. So the kids get a much better 1 on 1 ratio. Your doing wonderful and your social skills are getting so much better. You have a little best friend named Max and you and Max are so good together. You both talk to each other and engage in play with each other and its awesome to see you both act that way. We have been doing a huge assessment through his therapy and to see what you can and cant do. And so far everything on there has been that you can do it...and you do everything to where you should be at! That makes me so happy to know that in most places your developing right where you should be. There are a few things where its very hard for you to do but that's nothing compared to what you CAN do! I have been very discouraged and stressed out this past week because everything seemed like it was coming crashing down on me. We had some good therapists quit, you started to pick up some strange behaviors, your aggressiveness has been coming back, and daddy was going to be gone this weekend camping with the scouts and I didn't know how I was going to do it. So I went searching for some inspiration in the way of a poem or a story of something that would make me feel better. And this is the very first one I saw...and I knew it was put there just for me right at that time. This is you almost 100% and so I wanted to post it so you could read it.

I am Ethan:

You may not understand me, or the way I feel today.

You may not understand my reasoning for things I do or say.

The reasons why I’m so loud and say things over & over again,Why I run so differently or lose my homework every now & then.

I write my letters backwards and sometimes numbers too,and when in a conversation, I’ll say “Guess what” 100 times to you.

Too much noise, light, or excitement can set me in a spin.

I don’t like the way these pants feel rubbing against my skin.

I try to be good, but sometimes it’s hard to control,I have to do it, it’s an impulse, I don’t always do what I’m told.

Ketchup, Ranch and BBQ sauce on everything I eat,sometimes I have days that I just can’t sit still in my seat.

I like to talk a lot even when it’s out of turn,my mind plays tricks on me and interrupts what I’m trying to learn.

Sit up straight, wipe my face, and play ever so soft,some of these things

I have trouble with and I usually lose my train of thought.I didn’t mean to spill the milk mom, or slam the door so hard,everyone else is done with their homework, I don’t know where to start?

My heart’s as big as gold, my feelings get hurt too,I get sad, cry and have bad days just like you.

My brain works differently than other girls and boys,but one thing always holds true, I can give your life so much joy.

I get frustrated so easily and my hand won’t work that way,I don’t understand why those other kids won’t let me come over and play.

Please don’t think of me any differently or love of me any less,I’m just like other kids and trying to do my best.

I am very special in my own unique way,and every moment with me you’ll never have a dull day.

I am Mom:

I love you more than the sun moon and stars,my little miracle you’ve come oh so very far.

Each day that you grow and learn and love I thank god for everything in the heavens above.

You are sweet, smart, and funny, all rolled into one and you have so much love to give, you‘re my whole world my very special son.

© Kelly Graham

Happy Birthday Jacob!! Aug '08

Happy Birthday Jacob!!!!

Today is your 6th birthday!! I cant believe that I have a 6 yr old. So because you are 6, here are 6 things that I love about Jacob!!

1. You are so sweet!! You are full of hugs and kisses right now. You love to give anyone a hug and a kiss. You tell me you loves me about 20 times a day...and I love it!!!

2. You work SO HARD!!! When it comes to therapy's you never give up you are always working hard and accomplishing all of your goals.

3. you are the life of the party. You are always wanting to have fun. You love to make people laugh and usually does it just acting like Jacob because your such a fun kid.

4. Your love for music is just awesome! You can pick up any song the first few time you hear it and sing it again. You loves to play the piano, guitar, and drums. If your not talking, your usually singing.

5. Your one after my own heart...you LOVE to talk!! Yes anyone can tell your MY son since we both talk so much. But I love it because it reminds me of me.

6. You love your cousins more than anything. You make a reference to at least 2 of your cousins a day. When we asked you who you wanted to come to your bday party all you named was your cousins. Too bad they all are not here =( But when your cousins come into town...that's all you can talk about to anyone. And you have the same love for the oldest cousin right down to the youngest.

Love ya Jakie!

Mommy!

So scary! May '08

Something happened yesterday morning that I knew was coming, I just prayed and hoped it would never happen. You and Tyler and I went to walmart to get a few things for the week. Normally you are always in the cart but because we had so many things you had to walk. So as we were walking out the door, Tyler stopped the door lady because he wanted a sticker we didn't get when we walked in. So as we are talking to her I look out the door and you just dart across the street like you do every time but this time there was a car and you got hit by a car. The lady that was driving was only going like 10 miles an hour so she was able to stop pretty fast and it only hit the side of you, but you fell to the ground and was crying and really upset, even tho you had no idea what just happened. You was so unaware that there was a car there and that it was going to hit you if you ran in front of it. I kept asking you where it hurt and you said nothing hurt but I took him to the ER anyways just to get checked over. The doc checked you over and did a scan of your head to look for a concussion or something and said that you had a small concussion. you started throwing up yesterday and threw up about 3 times but have been acting perfectly fine. I think it hurt ME more than it did you. To watch my son get hit by a car has to be one of the worst sights I could see. I cried and cried until we saw the doctor and he said you were fine. Then I felt better and I was fine after that. Until you boys were in bed...and it was quiet...and I could just think about what REALLY happened. And then this horrible depression came on and I kept thinking about how it could of been worse and that just tore me up. I am so grateful that it was something so minor. And the fact that bad things just keep happening to us and I don't know when its all going to stop.

Love ya

mommy!

In your therapy they have been changing his schedule A LOT. You don't adapt easy to a schedule change and its just not a good thing. So you have been having a lot of behavior problems, at therapy, and at home. So last Wednesday your teacher tells me that she wants me to meet with her and then one of the head guys at your therapy center. I am scared to death because I think your gonna get kicked out of school or therapy or something. She told me that we have to discuss his behavior so I knew you were gone. The next day I go for our meeting and they started out by talking about positive things about you, which was GREAT. It made me feel like they weren't there just to tell me all the bad things about you. So then we go to start talking about your behaviors. I guess at therapy (and at home) you have been running into walls, kids, adults, throwing toys, not having control of your body and hitting yourself on things. So after hearing this I had mentioned to them that maybe it could be sensory problems? They totally agreed with me and said that it definitely could be that. Now I have written before about you and your sensory issues that we were getting you diagnosed with a sensory disorder. It never got done so we never addressed that. But since all of these new behaviors are going on we definitely are going to address it. You just got a new occupational therapist and so when you and her get to know each other more we are going to have her make you up a sensory diet. Its not a diet that you eat but its activities that you do to give more sensory since you are seeking it the most. Examples would be, deep pressure, playing with play-doh, jumping, swinging, spinning around, playing with shaving cream or sand, brushing...and more. So we will see what they come up with for you. We are going to have to do it every 45 min so that's going to be a challenge but I am pretty sure its going to work. On Sunday, during Sac Meeting, you were sitting on my lap and I started giving you pressure and next thing I know you were fast asleep...haha. It calmed him down so much that it put you right to sleep.

Love ya buddy!

Mommy

A new year! Jan '08

A month or so ago, we took you to a psych because of your aggression. Your DP wanted to put you in a mental institution because one day, when you got mad at me, you told me you wanted to kill me. I told that to your DP and she told me that saying it just once is reason enough to put him in there. I told her NO I was not going to let her do that. So we agreed to go see a psych and see if there is anything they suggest. So we go, and of course you have to be the best you have ever been. You look at her when you talk and you answer all of her questions and then you go and play with a puzzle. She told me that she did not think you had autism because you looked at her when you were talking to her and that you never regressed on anything when you were younger. She told me that ALL autistic kids regress on speech or something. I laughed about that because no 2 autistic kids are the same. There is no defining factor on what makes a child have autism. So then we get to talking about the meds that your on and I told her that your really calm because of it. Well she tells me that the autistic traits you have are because of his ADHD...not the other way around. I started to think about it a little bit and figured she must be right. So then we talk about his aggression. She thinks you might have anxiety. Which is what you DP thought too...so we may go on with that but im not pressing anything. So she prescribes you a drug called Rispidal. Its to help calm and not be so aggressive and anxious. When you were on it...things were great. You were not aggressive...did not hurt tyler, I didn't hear any tantrums, no pounding on walls and throwing things when you were mad. But if I missed a dose it would get really bad. I was giving you .25 mg 3 times a day. And on top of that your vyvanse for his ADHD. So last week, we went to your DP appt again and I told her everything that we talked about at this other appt. And she was beyond upset at this doctor. For one..we were giving Jacob basically 2 of the same meds and we never knew it. So he was getting the same med twice basically. and the dosage that the psych prescribed is VERY strong for a little 5 yr old boy with no meat on his bones. So now we have to go get your blood tested to make sure everything in your body is running fine. I guess the reason why he would get so violent and angry when he didn't have it was because of the withdrawal. You were already addicted to it just being on it that short of time. I haven't given it to you since and I don't think I will anymore. You are back to being on no meds right now so we have to figure out another plan to get you calm and back to focusing so that we can get you ready to go back to school next year.

Love you!

mommy

Sensory diet...oct '07

I had a little meeting with some of your therapists. And we decided that it would be the best to try you on a little sensory "diet" We are just going to try it out for a few weeks and see what happends. Here is a little bit about it. This is taken from a website I go to quite a bit. http://www.kid-power.org/sid.html

Sensory Integration Dysfunction is the inability of the brain to correctly process information brought in by the senses. Sensory Integration Dysfunction (SID/DSI) or sensory processing deficits can come in many different forms. No two children will be affected in the same ways. SID/DSI was first noticed in children with autism or who had autistic traits but is also seen in children with other disabilities such as cerebral palsy or ADD/ADHD

Here are also a few "signs" that told us that you had this and it was something to look into.

-- Loves to spin, swing and jump--this will seem to calm them down after several minutes

-- Oversensitivity to sounds--will frequently cover ears. Or undersensivity.

-- May have an exceptionally high pain tolerance

-- Unusually high or low activity level

-- Resists new situations

-- Problems with muscle tone, coordination, motor planning

-- Can be very impulsive or distractible.

-- Persistently walks on toes to avoid sensory input from the bottom of the feet.

Now a lot of this stuff is similar to autism and ADHD. I found out that sometimes kids have sensory disorders and they get misdiagnosed as ADHD. So we are hoping that is your case. So in this diet you are supposed to do some sensory activity every half hour all day. So I figured I had to redo our schedule so that we could fit it in. Now they are going to work with you at therapy and thats where you are at the majority of the day. So when you are home, all we are goign to do is sensory activities. Here is our schedule

5:20am-8am

Wake up

Rub feet, hands, and back to wake up

Listen to calming CD in car when taking daddy to work

play on sit-n-spin

play with playdoh

eat crunchy breakfast with fruit

brush teeth with vibrating toothbrush

let you pick out what to wear for the day

8:30-3 Therapy

3-6pm

Playground for 30 min

Push Tyler in stroller for 30 min

mini tramp. excersizes

massage feet

wheelbarrow walk

oral work

6-8 pm

Help with cooking dinner

help set table

crunch/chewy food to snack on

family time-coloring or playdoh

Warm bath with bubbles and aroma therapy

massage for bedtime

Ok, so this is a lot I will post again tomorrow or in the near future why we have to do the things we are doing. A lot of this just looks like playing and having fun. But its basically therapy for you and I can not believe how much it helps. We started it tonight after you got home from respite and we did everything right on this schedule and you were out by 7. This NEVER happends. You had your bath and I was rubbing your back and you fell asleep while I was massaging you. I really hope this is going to be a start of something great!! I have been so overwhelmed at all this info and what to do but I really feel like im doing something good for you.

School update...oct '07

I wanted to update on how school has been going for you. It has been going GREAT!!! We have been so happy and so pleased at how things are. You are not being aggressive at all and have calmed down a whole lot being there. We also figured that you have a sensory disorder and that may be why you are so hyper instead of you having ADHD so we are trying to work with our OT and get you into some sensory stuff and hopefully that will help. You love your new school and love the kids that are there in with you. When you are being hyper they will do a brushing technique on you or put deep pressure on you and it usually calms you down. So ive started doing that at home too and it works wonders!! Another thing im going to start doing is the gluten free/casen free diet. I saw Jenny M. talking about it on all the shows she did and I really think I could try it. I mean the least it could do it not work...so starting on Monday we are going to start to take a little out of our diet at a time. I have pretty much a list of all the foods we can and cant eat so hopefully it should be pretty easy. We are still going to cut out all the artifitial coloring and sugars out of your diet because that does help your hyperness. So really, everything is going great and we couldnt ask for better. I am so glad we made the disison to take you out of Kindergarden and put you in this hab class.

Love ya, Mom

School issues..sept '07

we have been having major problems with you and your school/teachers/being in school all together. We get many notes and phone calls about your behavior and how aggressive you are to other kids. I had been thinking about taking you out of Kindergarten for a while but I really couldn't find a place to put you instead of being in school. Then I was introduced to this thing called structured hab at your therapy place. What they do, is they teach kids with autism (or any other special needs) how to act in a classroom setting. They have the room set up like a class and they work on special goals that the kids need to work on when they are in school. So hopefully a year of this and by next year you will be ready to go back to kindergarten. We were going to hold you back anyways because you are very young. Your bday was 3 days before the cut off to go to school so that's another reason it was a very easy decision. Your last day was on Friday and I didn't find out until Friday morning that we were able to get in on Monday. So it was very sudden and exciting. So I got a phone call from your teacher asking if we could come in for a meeting on Tuesday with the school psych and him. They wanted to talk about "options" for you. So I had the opportunity to tell him that they didn't need to worry about that, I would be taking you out and that it was your last day. Your teacher seemed pretty upset that I was taking you out...but I bet he was probably happy he didn't have to deal with you anymore. Its sad and I wished that all the special ed teachers had more training in special ed...not just being thrown in the class. He doesn't understand Autism and that's why it was so hard for him to have a good relationship with you. And I think that a lot of the aggression on your part was because you were frustrated. You needed more help than what your teacher/aids could give you, so this therapy is just what you need.

Love ya.

Mom

You are 5!!! Aug '07

Ok so this entery might be a little long, as I have a lot to talk about. First of all I want to talk about your bday! We had such a fun day. We didnt really do much because really, you dont care so why do a lot of stuff. We went to Peter Piper Pizza for lunch. Daddt was able to get a few hours off of work to come and Grandma was also there. We did our presents and ate and let you and Tyler play. While we were there, there was a ton of target employees. And they were all playing games. A lot of them just gave you their tickets and tokens. So we ended up with 460 tickets! You were sooo excited to be able to get a big toy. Although, most of it was candy that you got. Then we went home and went to make a cake. I let you help me with that because you love to help cook. The cake didn't turn out at all!! Thats why I never bother to make birthday cake...just buy it. But it was still fun trying to make it, and we did eat the mess afterward haha. You got lots of fun presents and was so excited to get them all.

Ok, so then yesterday I went and took you into the doc to get your allergies tested. Your psych said that sometimes kids with Autism/ADHD have allergies and thats what makes their behaviors bad. So I made an appt to get them tested to see if you were allergic to anything. Plus you are always having runny noses and sneezing so I figured you were allergic to something. They do the test and come back 20 min later and the nurse said...wow this is a good one. I looked and you were allergic to EVERYTHING they tested you for! It was only respiratory allergies and not food ones. So you are allergic to...feathers, mold, trees, plants, weeds, grass, dust, cat hair, dog hair, and some others I cant remember. So now I have to give you this med that I squirt under your tongue. But the doc said I have to give it to you every other day for 2-3 years and hopefully they should be gone by then.

Therapies...aug '07

You have been going to LIFE which is the therapy place you get your ABA and therapies at. The past 3 weeks you have been getting evaluated with Physical Therapy and Occupational Therapy. The PT just called me that has been working with you to tell me that you were not going to be having PT today because she has to type up the report and submit it to our Support Coordinator (SC) and then our SC has to see if we have enough hours and space for this therapy (which we do). So I asked her if that means you were qualified for PT. She told me that she was pretty sure you were but she had to tally up the points and then she will know for sure. But she basically told me that you did. So its kinda sad but happy at the same time. I was sad because I didnt think that you were bad enough to need therapy but happy because you will finally get some muscle in your body! Just looking at you, you can see that you have no muscle tone at all. One of your MANY diagnoses include a diagnosis called Hypotonia which is low muscle tone.

Love ya buddy

Mommy

Im crying happy tears! Aug '07

One of the BEST things happend yesterday!! A lot of people take hugs from their kids for granted...NOT ME, only because you do not give hugs. For some reason autistic kids do not like to be touched, im not sure the reason, but you dont give hugs and if you try he will cry. But yesterday ALL DAY you gave me about 10 hugs!! I was SO HAPPY!! I cried almost every time I got a hug from you. Then we went to grandma and grandads house and you gave grandad 2 big hugs which is VERY unusual. Grandad was very happy as well and kept telling you how proud he was of you =) We are so happy for you, Jake and hope that it doesnt stop. I love getting hugs from my little guy.

Yesterday you started your first day of therapy! You had ABA which is a behavior therapy type thing. you go Monday-Wednesday and has ABA for an hour and a half a day, and then has music therapy, occupational therapy, or physical therapy for an hour after each ABA session. Then yesterday, we also got hab and respite approved. I have a lady coming over from where we are doing Hab today so that we can fill out forms for the girl to start. She is going to be working with you 3 hours a day on the off days of ABA so thursday and friday and maybe some saturdays. She is actually in our ward and loves you. She has been coming over on her own time just to kinda work with you and observe you. So we are excited to get her to start with us and to get paid!! The place where I have you for therapy is called L.I.F.E. Center. They are brand new...just opened up yesterday actually. They have the best equiptment around and I am so excited for us to be going there. Everything is going so smooth there is no doubt in my mind this is where we are supposed to be...and this is what we are supposed to be doing for you.

We are having such a hard time with your behaviors. I started writing down everything he does to Tyler or another child so that I can show the doc that you are really bad. Not very many people believe me on how aggressive you are because its mostly done at home. When we go out, you are very quiet and shy because you dont like meeting new people. But once you know the person, you will not be shy anymore, and show your real self...haha. Lately you have been obsessed with numbers. you are constantly asking me what time it is...or you will tell me what time it is. you know almost every channel on the TV just if we tell you to turn it to a channel you dont even have to tell him what number it is, you already know and will turn it there. Its not because we watch a lot of tv you will just flip through the channels for hours if I let you. Its a little annoying at times, but these are the things I just have to learn to deal with.

Love ya buddy.

Love mommy!

YAY! July '07

We finally hit a good milestone in the autism stuff. We got qualified for ALTCS. Its what we have to go through in Arizona to get services for you. I was really worried that we wouldn't qualify because you arent very severe but we did and I'm so happy!! Now we can get you all the therapy's that you need, and get respite and hab and get you to learn to live with his autism and try to get you better. I started this process when you were diagnosed on 2-2-07 and we finally were approved 7-10-07. The lady that came over said that someone should be contacting me on the services we get and then I can start with them. But you will be in school in a month, and so we wont have a lot of time for them like we did during the summer. So our days are going to be full in the afternoon when you get home from school. We will have hab, respite, Speech therapy, occupational therapy, physical therapy, and music therapy.

YAY for happy things!

Love ya, Mommy!

AHHH!! June '07

I am at the end of my rope with you. I am not sure if this is an autism thing, ADHD thing, or just because your a *bad* kid. But your behaviors have become VERY severe and VERY bad! I am no sure what to do with you and your behaviors anymore. We cant punish you because you just dont care. I try taking toys away and that doesnt bother you. you dont play with toys or anything else so taking something away doesnt work. When you are in time out you will come right back out...ive tried everything to make time out work and it doesnt work. Ive tried yelling and spaking and you just laughed at me. Ive tried the loving approach and that didnt work either, it just made you do more. We have you on meds for ADHD and ever since we put you on those its like these behaviors have become way worse.

Its 7 am and ill tell you what you have already done in the hour we have been awake. you took a blanket and tried to choke your brother, you were throwing a shoe at the wall and every time I told you to stop you would keep doing it ,you turned on the water outside and threw your brother in it, you got markers and colored yourself and your shirt. I am not sure what to do anymore and I hate feeling like you have defeted me. Like I am nothing to you because you just wont listen to me...or your dad.

But like everything else, we will get through this.

Love ya!

Mommy

more appointments! June '07

Tomorrow morning we are having this lady come from the Department of Developmental Disabilities (DDD) to meet you and I. She is our new support coordinator and so she just wants to come over and talk for a bit and get to know us and let us know what all we qualify for and stuff. I already know that we don't qualify for anything because DDD has little funding and its basically already being used up. So we have to go and apply for Arizona Long Term Care Services(ALTCS) and that has a lot more funding and that's how we can get our therapies and meds covered. We did apply for it once , and got denied. They didn't even come to our house and meet us and evaluate you. They just sent a letter saying that we did not qualify. Our new SC said that we need to appeal that and get another application in. So that's what we are doing now!! I hope that they approve us because you really need these therapies. Its 10:41 and you just fell asleep about 10 min ago and had been screaming for the past 3 hours. Not sure why...but you do this at least 3 times a week. I don't know if its the meds that your taking or what but you just are uncontrollable when you go through these.

Doctor appt May '07

We just had your drs appt at the Melmed Center a few days ago. The Melmed center is a place that has pych and developmental pediatricians there. Basically for kids who have brain issues...lol and developmental problems. We go here once ever 3 months for your "therapy" for your autism and ADHD. Well when we went we finally got the official diagnosis for severe ADHD. She told us that you are as bad as they get...you cant get any worse than what you are. It was pretty hard to hear because I really didn't think you were that bad. So we decided to put you on meds. You are only 4 and we really didn't want to do it but she said that its the only thing that's going to help you. And if we don't put you on meds then you wont get any better and we will just hurt you more than putting you on meds. She told me of the side effects and I felt like that was a good decision. The first day that we had you on them, I have noticed a BIG difference. It is making you very sleepy. Which is fine by me, but I dont think you like being on them. When you come off of it you get very cranky and will usually just cry for about 45 min while your coming off of them. And then you will get REALLY hyper. I can usually tell when your coming off of them. I think its too strong for you and so we are supposed to go back in 4 weeks for the follow up and I am going to see if she has anything different we can try on you.

When we had your K transition meeting, we decided to put you in the intergraded kindergarden. Its kinda like normal K but they dont sit at tables...they do centers and learn like that. I had requested to go in and observe the class that is going on now just to make sure that is the class I want you to be in. I know that you can not be in normal K even with his meds. you just cant sit and concentrate that much right now so we had to figure something else out. Plus you are going to have speech and OT during school time and its easier if he is in a class where everyone needs it as well. We had to choose between the Autism class or this IK class. We didnt go with the Autism one because most of the kids that are in that class are severe and we dont want you to start to model those behaviors that the more severe kids do. But with the IK class we can have what you need to help your autism. Like you will have your own picture schedule for the whole day. We use that at home and you also uses that at school right now and that has helped so much! You have to be on a schedule and you do very well with pictures since you can see what it is instead of trying to read it. Also we will have your therapys. I am going to try to get Physical Therapy to start at school too that way we dont have to do any therapy at home and after school. Well I go and observe the class on Thursday! I am excited to go and see what you are going to be doing next year. i am getting kinda sad about you going to all day kindergarden. I am sure you will do fine but its going to be a big adjustment for you . Its probably going to be a rough few days as you adjust to it but im sure in the long run it will be the best for us.

just an update April '07

Oh, what a day!!! We have been busy and thats a good thing. Youdid not have school today and so those days are usually very hectic. I like to be out of the house when you don't have school because it helps you not be so crazy!!

This morning I was making waffles. As I was getting the waffles cooked I set out the butter and syrup. Well, I turn my back to you and Tyler and go back to the waffles and I hear you guys outside. I was just thinking of how good you guys were playing together and how much fun you were having when I hear tyler screaming. So I go out there to see you with the bottle of syrup and you and tyler were covered from head to toe in syrup!!! The whole brand new bottle was empty! I was so mad!!! I put you in time out and then threw you guys in the bath tub. It took me about 20 min to get the stickyness off of your bodies.


We are in an awesome playgroup. I have searched and searched to find a good one and I am so excited to of found a great one. These ladies are so wonderful and so understanding to your needs and they are great with you. Well every month they have this birthday celebration type thing for all of the kids and adults bdays that happened in that month. Well today was the bday celebration for April. It was a lot of fun and you did really good there. I sometimes have a hard time with you because you are so much bigger than all of the other kids. You usually take away toys from the kids because that's just part of the autism thing, I guess. You don't understand that the kids are playing with the toys and that you just cant take it out of their hands. We had a little bit of that but it wasn't too bad...I was so proud of you and how you acted today. Then after that we went to goodwill. I love that store because you can get clothes for you kids so cheap there. you boys are very rough on your clothes so you stain them and get holes in them almost every day! Well while we were there you had a meltdown because I was going to make you ride in the cart and you did not want to. So after your meltdown was over I let you walk. Well that was a big mistake because as I was looking through some clothes you had wandered off. Thats a big autism thing, is wandering. And I know that and you have a big wandering problem but I didnt know that it would be that bad since you were standing next to me. Well I look all over the store and there you are pulling off every single shirt off of the hangers where the womens clothes were!!!

AHHHH it never ends...as im writing this you just ripped Tylers backpack off of his back and then pushed tyler down. Why do you do this stuff? I guess thats just something im going to have to research on kids with autism...who knows if its that or just you being mean.

I know we will get through all of this. I love you buddy.

Love Mommy

A new chapter in our life Feb '07

Hi Jacob

We are now starting a new chapter in our lives. We are now in the autism world. On Feb 2nd we found out that you have Autism along with ADHD. We feel blessed that you finally got the help that you needed so bad. And that we finally got an answer to the questions we have always had about you. When you was born you were always moving around. You crawled early, and walked early! We just thought that you was going to be early at everything. I am fluent in sign language and so I always wanted my kids to know and love sign language like me. When you was a year old I started teaching you sign language. You was getting pretty good and knew a lot of signs and used that for everything. When you was around 2 1/2 I noticed that you weren't talking and that it seemed pretty weird. You was my first so I just figured that you would catch up soon. I started to blame myself because I thought it was because I taught you sign language and had you use that instead of his words. You was also very active. I hated taking you to other peoples houses because you was always running around and getting into all of their stuff. you would turn on and off lights and shut all the doors...it was just emberassing. Again, I knew that was a little strange, but I never thought anything of it. We lived in Texas at the time and 2 months after you turned 3 we moved back to Arizona. My aunt stacy was visiting and telling me that you really dont have good speech and that we should get you tested to see if you can go to the preschool program that the public school has. So we got you tested and you passed with flying colors! So we got you in and you started to prgress amazingly!!! IN a year you went from NO words to 2 word sentances. We were so happy that you were talking and we were starting to understand you more. Lets fastforward to December '06. You are still very hyper and your speech is starting to get so much better. But now you have weird behaviors...you are very viloent to yourself and to other people. You wont look into your eyes when people talk to you and you wander off and will dart in front of cars without even knowing what he is doing. I go in to a meeting with his teacher and she tells me that she is concerned with you, Jacob and your behaviors. She told me that you are the worst kid that she has seen in the hyperness and not being able to focus on anything. So she said it would be wise to take you into his ped and see what he thought. So we did and immidiatly he told us that he would like us to go to a developmental pediatrition and see what they think. So Feb 2nd comes and we go to our appt. Within 30 min of being there she already knew that you had autism. I kinda prepared myself for that going in because I was 90% sure thats what you had. But I thought he had a form called Aspergers. I didnt know that he was worse than I thought. She diagnosed you with Severe ADHD, High Functioning Moderate Autism, Developmental delay, and a speech delay. I was so overwhelmed when she told me that I just broke down! I was a mess, and I still am. We are still getting used to the autism diagnosis and every day I find something different that you do that makes me say...hmm yep I see the autism in you. But we are so proud at the work you do to make yourself better. We love you so much buddy.

Love

Mommy

Happy birthday you are 4!! Aug '06

Hi Jacob

You like to be called Jacob now. They started calling you that in school and now you dont want to be called anything else but Jacob. I was not sure how I would like that but its growing on me. As you can see you can now talk! YAY!!! This speech therapy school has been amazing for you. You survived one whole year of it. You are now starting your 2nd year of school. You still have a lot to work on speech wise but you are doing great. I didnt realize how far behind you were at some things but this school has helped you do a lot. You are such a hard worker and im proud of you for that. We are having so much fun in our new house. You love having a back yard to run around in. You would spend all day and all night in that backyard if I let you. You have so much energy its so nice to have something to let you let all of that out.

For your birthday party today we are going to peter piper pizza. Its one of your favorite places. Its so much fun to have games to play and pizza to eat. All of your family will be there to help you celebrate your birthday. This year for your birthday you are getting a leapster. Its such a fun little game system that will help you learn and hopefully it will help you talk better. Even tho you are already doing awesome in talking.

A few months ago I got you and tyler your pictures taken. They are so cute. Here are a few of them for you to remember.

Moving...again Nov '05

Well the time is here. We moved again! Unkie and Aunt Debbie moved out of their house and the landlord was nice enough to let us move right in to their house. We live sooo close to grandma and grandad Malone. Its been so much fun living in an actual HOUSE! The last one we lived in was when we moved to Texas. But that house was not very nice. This house is super nice and I am so excited for our new experience. Since we had to move cities you had to leave your school. But we are getting you right into the pre school here in Gilbert. It seems to be better than Mesa! Your teacher is awesome and she seems to have a lot to offer to you.

Love ya

Mommy

You start school! Sept '05

What a fun day for you! Today you start school for the first time. Right before your birthday Aunt Stacy was here. She was telling me that you really needed to get into some speech therapy because you didn't talk. She told me that Mesa school district has a cool program for kids that have speech problems. They go to school at the public school for preschool and they give the kids speech therapy. So we had you tested and they got you in right away! So today you started school for the first time. It was so sad. I followed the bus to school to make sure they went right to school with you. You looked so small getting on that big bus. I cant believe my 3 yr old is going to school but I know it will help you so much. Your teacher seemed very nice and your class seemed a lot of fun. I hope this is the start of something great for you. In other news, I think we are moving. Our lease is up soon here in this condo and we are ready for something else. Stay tuned to next update to see where we moved to, or even if we ended up moving. Love ya hun.

Mommy

Happy 3rd birthday!! Aug '05

Happy happy birthday Jakie dear! Today is a wonderful day for us, and for you. My sweet Jake is 3 years old. You are such a big boy now. You are such a great big brother to your little brother Tyler. You help mommy out with so much. But you sure do keep us busy. You are constantly running around and being a hyper boy. Sometimes its hard to take care of both you and tyler at the same time. You still dont really talk but we are working on it. The doctor just told me that boys develop at their own pace and you are just taking a little bit more time to talk than most kids your age. We also bought you a bike. We are getting you to peddle the bike but it seems to be hard for you. However, you love being pushed on it around the parking lot. Your favorite things are...the wiggles, elmo, coloring with crayons and chalk. You will sit and watch the wiggles for hours and hours. It seems to be the only thing that keeps your attention. So we tend to let you watch it a lot. You also love to watch daddy play his video games. I have a feeling when you get older you are going to love them. Things have been so much better since moving back to Arizona. You seem to be happier here, and I am happier as well. Your favorite foods are chicken nuggest, eggs, mac and cheese, and anything with chicken. I hope this year will be the best of them all. Love you son!

mommy

Happy 2005! Jan '05

Today is January 1st! It is a new year and a new experience. You have a new baby BROTHER! We were all right that it was going to be a boy. I am still in the hospital right now with him so I thought that I would write in your book just as I wrote in his. The other good news is that we moved back to Arizona!! I was just so sad living away from everyone that daddy knew he had to move us back to arizona. Uncle bill got him a good job where he works and so it was easy to come in and move back. We also found a place to live that fits us perfectly. You will be sharing a room with your new brother. You surprised us all and you potty trained yourself!! Its been amazing. You never really told me that you had to go potty. You just went up to the toilet, sat down, and started going potty! It was amazing. You are such an amazing little boy. We love you so much and we are so happy to have you and your brother now.

Love ya

mommy!

Suprise you are 2!! Aug '04

Hi Jake!!

Sorry that I have not updated in a WHOLE YEAR!! We moved a few times and I lost the book. So I finally found it a few months ago and forgot until today. I knew that it was your birthday and that I needed to write in it. The biggest news is...you are going to be a big brother! Arent you so happy? I bet you are...haha I know I am. I always knew that you needed to have a big brother and now im glad that we finally have one for you. We dont know if its a boy or a girl yet. The doctor that I have was not completly sure. We saw 2 doctors and both doctors have not been able to tell if its a boy or a girl. Daddy and I both think its another boy. We would be so happy either way.

We joined a fun play group for you and its been a lot of fun. You have made lots of friends your age, and I have met a few people myself. However, its been so hard not being home in arizona with the family. Grandad just had his 60th birthday in June and everyone got together to have a big birthday party for him. We couldnt make it so we didnt go and I was so sad. I really want to move back to Arizona but daddy really likes it here and has a really good job so we will just stick it out. You have gotten sooo many more teeth its been so much fun. You are now eating regular food and you love it a lot. For your birthday today we are going to go to Chuck E. Cheese with a few of our friends. Its going to be so much fun. You LOVE to run around and touch everything so this place is perfect for you. You dont ever stop running but its been so much fun. You are keeping me in good shape with your "brother". Hopefully it wont take me till next year to write again. But with a new baby it just might. Well I am going to have to start your "brothers" book so that will make me write in yours too! I love you. You are making me soo happy every day. You are growing up so fast and I cant believe 2 years have gone past already.

Love, Mommy!

Happy 1st birthday! Aug '03

Happy Birthday Jake! We are in Arizona right now for your birthday. We dont really know many people in Texas so we decided to go to Arizona so that you would be surrounded by your family and the people that love you the most. Daddy couldn't make it because he had to work but we will have a birthday celebration back at home with daddy too. We had some family over and had cake. You had your own little cake too. It was so much fun to see you dig into your cake. At first you didnt know what was going on. But as soon as we put some cake in your mouth you wanted more and more. You couldn't quite figure out how to put the cake in your mouth so we did a lot of it for you with your hands. You had the biggest smile on your face. We knew that you loved it so much!!

In the past few months since I last updated you have started walking! YAY for you! It has been such a fun thing to see you finally walk. You also started to get a tooth last night. We still live in Texas and so far its been fun. I just got us into a moms group for some play groups and hopefully it will help us get to know some people. We live in a really small town and so there are not many moms groups. We had to go outside of our town to find a good moms group. There is one here in Greenville that seems fun. So hopefully it will work out for us. Here is a picture of you right before we went to Arizona.

Moving...March '03

We are moving this week. For the past 7 months we have lived in Mesa, Arizona. Close to family and friends and everything that we are familiar with. A few weeks ago daddy talked to someone on the phone at his work. He said that he had an amazing job opportunity for daddy to move to Texas and to work out there with them. This is something that daddy and I could not pass up. We both prayed really hard about it and this is what we are supposed to be doing for our family. Hopefully it will be a good move for us. Daddy is already there so we are doing this just you and I buddy. Grandad is going to drive the U haul truck there to help us move our stuff. Its going to be a fun experience. I am excited to see your aunt stacy and uncle curtis a lot. They live in Texas too with Taylor, Julia, and Joshua. We will see them as soon as we get there. She will come over to help us. Grandma too...she is flying in to help us move in and get settled.

You also started to roll over and sit up! It is so much fun to see you grow up like this. But sad at the same time. I dont want you to grow up. You are growing up too fast. You also like to sleep. You sleep about 12 hours at night now and still take a few naps during the day. It sure does help me when im trying to get some stuff done around here. You also have colic. Its not fun to deal with but we try to help you as much as we can. Its really hard when all you do is scream and cry. It makes me cry too. I just want you to feel better. They say that when babies have colic they cry at night. But you seemed to cry all the time. You are getting better and sleeping at night which is really good. You started with colic around 3 months and about 6 months you started to get a little bit better. I bought you some new bottles that seemed to help a little bit. You dont have as much gas as you used to. I hope you do good on the trip to Texas!

Love ya

Mommy

A sad day...Aug 30th

Today is a very sad day for me. Mommy got an infection and it has to be watched by the doctors. So today, Grandma Malone had to come and get you from me. You were released from the hospital but mommy still has to stay in for a little while longer. I am pretty sick and cant take care of you all by myself. I am so sad right now and I hope that I can get out of here soon. I just want to be a mommy and to take care of my son myself. But I know that Grandma will take great care of you.

Love you

Mommy!

You are born!

Hello Jake!

You were born today. This is the best day of my life. We sure did have a scary moment with you but we are so happy you are finally here. You are perfect in every way and your daddy and I are so happy to have you. Your grandmas were both here and they both love you as well. It was really funny right after you were born your grandma malone had to teach daddy how to hold you. But hes a pro and cant ever put you down.

I want to remember the way I feel right now, forever. I cant believe that I have a child of my own and that you are a little part of me and of daddy. You are so beautiful. I hope that we are good parents to you.

Love you so much buddy.

Mommy

Before you were born

Hi Jacob-

I wanted to tell you a little bit about how things were before you were born. I found out I was pregnant with you a few weeks after daddy and I got married. It was a big shock. I cried because I was so scared. I was not ready for a baby and daddy and I had just gotten married and I didnt know what to do. Daddy was VERY happy. He cried happy tears! Seeing him so happy made me happy too. I bought all the books I could telling me how to take care of my growing baby inside of me. The whole 8 of the 9 months went great. Then I started gaining a lot of weight and I got really swollen. My blood pressure started to get high every doctors appt. They were a little worried but didnt do much about it, other than telling me to sit down a lot and to take it easy. On Aug 26th our car got stolen out of our parking spot. The stress of that made me have lots of contractions. I knew it was time for you to be born. We waited to see if they would get stronger. So the next day, the 27th, they did. We decided to go to walmart that morning for some last min things for you. We walked around and the lady who was checking us out at walmart said to me, you look like you are in labor! I said...you know what, I think I am. So we went to grandmas house and told her that we were going to head over to the hospital. When we got there they told me that they thought I had pre eclampsia. So they started me on something called magnesium. It helps so I wouldn't have seizures. Because they gave it to me my contractions stopped all together. Later that night they gave me some meds to get the contractions back up and going again. You didnt like it when I would have contractions and your heart rate would drop really low. About 7 am on the 28th your heart rate dropped very low. I didnt know what was going on. All the nurses and doctors rushed in to try to get your heart rate back up. They were pushing on my belly and they were rubbing it hard to get your heart to go up. They couldnt get it up so they decided to do a c section. I had 15 min to prepare and at 8:15 on Aug 28th you were born! You were a huge baby. You were 8 lbs 5 oz and oh so perfect.

Love you!

Mom